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EDITORIAL: Domestic abuse month is a year-round concern

Observer-Dispatch - 10/7/2018

Oct. 07--Question: Can we hear too much about domestic and sexual violence?

Answer: Absolutely not.

Raising consciousness is an ongoing task and it's one we must all embrace.

Fortunately, this area has YWCA Mohawk Valley (YWCA MV). While the organization always plans special events during the month of October -- Domestic Violence Awareness Month -- its efforts to assist victims of domestic violence through a wide assortment of programs is a 24/7, 365 days-a-year job.

Last year, the Y reached out more than 20,000 times to people seeking its services, says the Y's Allison Flanagan. Programs include a 24/7 confidential Domestic Violence and Sexual Violence hotline, advocacy and accompaniment in courts, law enforcement agencies and hospitals, counseling and support groups as well as community education and outreach.

YWCA MV also maintains two emergency shelters -- one in Utica and one in Rome -- and provides transitional housing for survivors of domestic violence who have decided to rebuild their lives.

According to the Y's web site, domestic violence is defined as abusive behavior -- emotional, physical, or sexual -- that one person in an intimate relationship uses in order to control another. It takes many forms and includes threats, name calling, preventing contact with family or friends, withholding money, actual or perceived physical harm, stalking, and sexual assault. Sexual violence covers many different acts, including but not limited to sexual abuse, assault, exploitation, or harassment. It can happen to anyone regardless of age or gender and in any setting.

Great as the Y programs are, we all need to play a role in fighting domestic violence. You can help raise consciousness by taking a few simple steps:

--Talk to your children about relationships and make sure they know the early signs of abuse. Tell them never to hesitate to seek help.

--Support programs aimed at fighting physical and mental domestic abuse. Teach young children how to better cope with anger and aggression so it doesn't some day take the form of abuse.

--Speak up. Family, friends, neighbors, co-workers and others should watch for signs that could indicate that something is wrong. Encourage victims to get help and offer support.

--Do not hesitate to get help. The National Domestic Violence Hotline reports that on average, nearly 20 people per minute are physically abused by an intimate partner in the United States. That's one in four 4 women and one in seven men that have been victims of severe physical violence by an intimate partner in their lifetime. Victims -- mostly women -- too often are reluctant to report abuse because they either fear the abuser or are dependent on him and don't know how they'd survive without him around.

The problem is, they might not survive WITH him around.

Many victims who do file charges eventually drop them for those same reasons. Don't. Abusers rarely change their ways, and the abuse likely will only get worse. You will have the support you need to go on.

YWCA Mohawk Valley, meanwhile, is offering several programs this month to raise community awareness to the problem.

--10th annual Reclaiming Freedom Celebration will be held Saturday, Oct. 20, at Valentino's Banquet Hall, 3899 Oneida St., Washington Mills. Three three local law enforcement officials -- Oneida County Sheriff Rob Maciol, Rome Police Chief Kevin Beach and Utica Police Chief Mark Williams will be recognized for their work in ending domestic violence in Oneida County. Tickets for the event must be secured by Thursday, Oct. 11, by contacting YWCA MV via email at events@ywcamv.org or via phone at 315-732-2159, ext. 238.

--Take Back The Night, a multifaceted event that includes a rally, march, speak-out, and candlelight vigil, serving as a peaceful protest to call attention to domestic and sexual violence. YWCA MV will held in Utica on Tuesday, Oct. 16, from 6 to 8 p.m., beginning at YWCA MV main office at 7 Rutger Park in Utica and march to Utica City hall (one mile walk). Another will be held Thursday, Oct. 18, in Rome from 6 to 8 p.m., at Rome City Hall198 N. Washington St.

--Take Back the Night also is part of YWCA USA's Week Without Violence initiative, Oct. 15-19.

--Finally, the Purple Ribbon Campaign will take place throughout the month. Participating businesses -- Alice's Beauty Salon, Bagel Grove, Café Domenico, Divine Designs Beauty, The Observer-Dispatch, Olde Wicker Mill, and Utica Gas & Electric -- will be selling paper purple ribbons for $1 and will display them through October.

Support these efforts this month and throughout the year. And learn more by visiting ywcamv.org.

Get help

Most important, if you or someone you know and love is a victim of domestic abuse, do not hesitate to reach out for help. Here are 24-hour emergency hotlines in Oneida and Herkimer counties where you can find it:

In Oneida County: 797-7740. That's the YWCA Mohawk Valley. The Y will offer assistance by providing emergency shelter for those who need immediate protection.

In Herkimer County: 866-0458. That's Catholic Charities of Herkimer County. It, too, provides assistance to domestic violence victims or those who suspect it.

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(c)2018 Observer-Dispatch, Utica, N.Y.

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