Family time together is an investment with dividends

Muskogee Phoenix - 9/14/2017

Sept. 13--An organization with more than 50 years of experience in dealing with troubled youth and the family units they come from said parents wanting to help their families bond together can follow some simple tips.

While the tips may sound simple, they require some dedication to follow through with, say counselors at Rawhide Boys Ranch in New London, Wisconsin. The goal of the facility's program is to provide stability to cultivate familial-type bonding to help families grow and heal.

"Building fun memories is an important aspect for strengthening family bonds," said a press release from Rawhide. "Better communication creates more trust within the family, helping all family members better understand other family members."

The healthy living website verywell.com provides tips for improving the strength of family units and said one thing parents should not do is neglect time for themselves.

"Parenting is a huge responsibility that you are required to fulfill every day," said verywell.com. "Even the U.S. Department of Labor requires companies to give employees two 10-minute breaks during a work day. Shouldn't you do the same?"

The site said the reality for parents is that they will be a better parent when they take some time just for themselves.

"Take a break and read a chapter in a book, go to the salon, or play a round of golf," the site said. "Do something you enjoy, even if only for a few minutes."

Heathy Living magazine said research shows that those who are grateful in their daily lives experience less stress-related health symptoms, like headaches, stomach issues, chest pain, muscle aches and appetite problems. So, say 'thank you' to your friends and family: It's proven to deepen existing relationships.

Experiencing something new -- like riding that roller coaster or taking a pottery class -- heightens awareness and activates adrenaline. These senses work together to make meaningful memories that last, which help fortify and strengthen family relationships, the magazine said.

University of Delaware Extension Service offers advice for families which includes stressing that every child is special and needs special time to have a parent alone to themselves.

"Giving your child some 'special time' helps develop a close relationship with your child," the extension service said. "If you can make it a predictable ritual, your child can depend on it -- and look forward to this time with you."

Be sure that this "special time" is not easily interrupted by other activities. For example, don't answer the phone during this time, the extension service said.

Allow your child to help you decide how to spend this time. You could read books, sing songs, go for a walk, play a game -- or whatever your child enjoys. The more you are able to spend special time with your child the stronger your relationship will be.

Although setting aside time with your child is important, also look for small moments that you can use to connect with your child, the Delaware agency said.

Researchers say that spending frequent, brief amounts of time, as little as 1-2 minutes, involved in child-preferred activities is one of the most powerful things parents can do.

"You can make up stories together while doing chores, talk about concerns while on the way to the grocery store, read a book together while waiting for dinner to finish," the extension service said. "We often think we have to wait for our 'special time' but all these small moments help us stay connected in between the more scheduled times."

Reach Mike Elswick at (918) 684-2954 or melswick@muskogeephoenix.com.

15 tips for maintaining or strengthening family ties

1. Regularly eat dinners together.

2. Plan activities together.

3. Turn chores into fun family time.

4. Volunteer together.

5. Write notes to each other.

6. Laugh together.

7. Develop healthy communication styles.

8. Learn from our mistakes.

9. Forgive each other.

10. Be just. If a punishment is deemed necessary, make sure it's just.