Program helps families reconnect after addiction

March 03-- Mar. 3--FARRELL -- Sonya Perez-Palmer's grandchildren will push her buttons until they find the detonator.

There was a time when the grandmother of seven was quick to explode, but now she defuses the situation by pulling out her journal and writing down her thoughts.

It's a coping mechanism she learned in the Farrell Family Center's Families in Recovery Program -- a seven-week program developed by PA Family Support Alliance aimed to help parents overcome addiction, and rebuild and strengthen relationships within the family.

"You can teach an old dog new tricks," Perez-Palmer, 56, said about her newly learned coping mechanism. "It helps me stop and think before I react. It feels so good to know why I'm acting a fool."

The program covers seven topics -- one per week -- including identifying strengths and needs within the family, communication styles, discipline and development, all teaching its members how to balance the needs of their own recovery.

"It's about helping families reconnect," said Farrell Family Center director Patty Parenti.

Addiction can cause people to miss a lot of time with their kids. "They can come back as a different person," she said. "Sometimes the family doesn't know what to expect."

Emily Pierce's daughter was taken by Youth Protective Services shortly ofter she was born. The 4-month-old was returned to her parents in January, and it's the catalyst of Pierce's recovery and her decision to join the Families in Recovery Program.

"I like being able to come here and open up," she said. "I like knowing I can come relax in a safe place."

The program also focuses on nutrition and healthy sleep habits. Child care is provided by the center so that the children have a chance to socialize, too.

Mario Motha, a recovery specialist at the the Farrell Family Center, said setbacks are to be expected when dealing with recovery. The program began with six members, but two have since relapsed and gone back to rehab.

"Relapse is part of the process," he said. "Sometimes people get judged for that, but we're here to embrace the struggles ... We're looking for progress, not perfection."

Perez-Palmer has three adult daughters but is helping to raise three grandchildren, ages 8, 7 and 19 months. She was in recovery for six years before she slipped up last December.

"I tell my (grandchildren) 'we are a work in progress,'" she said.

She credits the Families in Recovery Program for much of the headway she has made since her relapse.

"I just love it here," she said. "Just being able to talk and knowing you aren't alone in what you are feeling helps so much."

Motha emphasized that recovery is not just a one time thing -- it's a lifelong process with plenty of obstacles. He stresses "people, places and things" as factors that need to be changed when someone enters a recovery program.

But sometimes it's not that simple.

Perez-Palmer still lives in the same building as one of her former drug dealers, with another just down the street. The familiar faces serve as a reminder of her past life, but she said even they are supportive of the progress she has made.

"I live right in the middle of two dope dealers," she said. "I still see them and they tell me how proud of me they are. I fed them real good for a while."

And if the Families in Recovery Members aren't totally discarded mementos from the past, they have a community built for them to fall back on.

"We might all feel different ways, but we are all the same," Perez-Palmer said. "(The program) is like therapy for me."

___

(c)2019 The Herald (Sharon,Pa)

Visit The Herald (Sharon,Pa) at www.sharonherald.com

Distributed by Tribune Content Agency, LLC.