Family with sick child thankful for community support

SOMERSET - There's nothing that can truly ease the suffering for Selina Oehmen or her parents, but the kindness and care they've received from their many friends, neighbors, co-workers and even strangers has filled their hearts and made life bearable.

Selina, 10, was diagnosed with an inoperable and incurable brain tumor in February that has since left her paralyzed and unable to verbally communicate.

Since then, donations have poured in, giving Ken and Michelle Oehmen the gift of time with their daughter and the many small comforts that mean so much.

Michelle said she was "overwhelmed, floored, amazed" at the outpouring of support her family has received.

Over the weekend, a team of volunteers are working to erect a 22-foot round, above-ground swimming pool in their backyard. They'll dig a trench, pour sand, and install electricity and a liner so the pool is a permanent structure. In the past, the Oehmen's used inflatable swimming pools that usually didn't last beyond summer.

Ken and Michelle said the new pool will be a spot for Selina to cool off on a flotation device. It'll also be a way for her to regain something she loved.

"She's always been our fish," Michelle said. "She would spend every waking hour in the pool."

Selina recently used the hot tub to float. Her dad said "she loved it."

Even though Selina can't speak, she's able to move her head to one side for "yes" and the other for "no." It's apparent what she's thinking by her head and eye movement. And, she said she was happy to get the new pool.

Selina hasn't moved for five months following a seizure early in her diagnosis. Michelle, a teacher in Fall River, and Ken, a Navy veteran and a Navy logistics management specialist at the Naval Undersea Warfare Center in Newport, care for their daughter without outside help.

That's because they don't yet qualify for Medicaid to pay for any in-home care. Michelle has been using up sick time to take care of Selina. Currently, she's on a leave of absence for the foreseeable future.

Ken's co-workers have been donating their sick leave to him so he can be with his family.

With donations - roughly $25,000, including more than $10,000 from an online fundraiser -the Oehmens have been able to purchase a handicapped-accessible van to take Selina out in the community and to appointments.

Funds have also paid for a wheelchair for Selina.

They received help from the Somerset Fire Department and Home Depot to install a handicapped accessible ramp outside their home. Friends and strangers have held several fundraisers for the family.

"People have been coming out of the woodwork," Michelle said. "My freezer is still full of food." The meals came from her co-workers.

Five checks had also just arrived from their parish, St. Patrick's Church in Somerset, where Michelle worked a second job and Selina was an altar server.

The help is appreciated by the Oehmens. Michelle said she'd "like to thank everyone," but can't always get to the task right away.

The community's help has made the Oehmens' days a little brighter.

"It's a little overwhelming," Ken said. "But, if the tables were turned, we'd do the same."

Ken and Michelle, also the parents of two teenaged boys, just celebrated 20 years of marriage. In May, they were all treated to performances of "Frozen" and "The Lion King," as part of a wish granted to Selina from Rosemary's Wish Kids of Rhode Island.

Michelle said that in learning about her daughter's tumor, she doesn't know how much time they'll have with her, so moments like those are precious.

The tumor - diffuse intrinsic pontine glioma - is an aggressive cancer of the brain stem that strikes about 300 children in the United States each year. There is no cure, but treatments are giving Selina more time.

"She's still fighting every day," Michelle said. "It's so hard. That little girl had such spunk."

Michelle said Selina was "sassy" and enjoyed softball and playing the cello.

To help the Oehmen family with a donation, visit the Selina Strong fundraising page at https://www.gofundme.com/5qdsb-selina-strong

Email Deborah Allard at dallard@heraldnews.com.