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Passive Aggressive Abuse

Author: khalilahk ( Social Network of Care )
Posted: 05/17/2012 @ 8:08 pm

I never thought I would end up in an abusive relationship let alone marriage. I always looked for those warning signs and steered clear of certain types. But here I am just as battered without a single punch being thrown. My husband is is incredibly passive aggressive that I am feared into acting a certain way to avoid him wrath. From days of silents aggression to outbursts directed at the children instead of me he keeps me walking on eggshells. His constant invasion of my privacy from checking all text messages, cell phone calls, my Facebook page, and my journal I have been completely cut off from friends and family. I don't even turn on my cell phone anymore. If my sister asks me to come visit I say no because of the anticipated attitude I will get if I tell him I'm going to lunch with my sister or even the movies with my teenage son. If he is not going then no one can go. The crazy thing is he never will say don't go. He'll punish me in other ways. Or he'll sabotage it by losing the car keys or suddenly needing to leave the kids in my care so he can run a not so quick errand. When I confront him about anything the passive aggression escalates. When I talk to him he goes silent and just make angry expressions or worse, he'll walk out of the room while I'm talking and just simply ignore me completely. Then the next day he'll wake up and make breakfast and give me flowers like nothing ever happened. I've gotten to the point where I don't even try to be social with anyone anymore. And I certainly don't dare invite anyone over to my house. He is so antisocial social it's embarrassing. He leaves the living room and I'm forced to entertain alone. Then when company leaves he complains that he is jealous of all the time I spent with them...his time!!! How on earth did I get myself into this? To be completely truthful, I stay because the thought of him alone with the kids is far more scary then my day to day life. And if he's virtually stalking me now i can't imagine what he would evolve to if I left. Does anyone else relate to any of this? I could really use some support.

Author: Kathy Sterbenc ( Social Network of Care )
Posted: 08/30/2012 @ 1:55 pm

Hello, khalilahk -

Thank you for your post. If you would like any resources to assist you in your situation, please email me at, and I will be very happy to send information.

Best wishes,